Lessons I Learnt Last Year

Hey soul tribe, it's me again!

I've missed you all so much. I took a break from this space to gain more experience, and to have other people experience me. It was a good ride, but I must say now that it’s game time peaches!

2023 came with loads of life lessons and you may perceive this in an exaggerated tone when I say I saw it all; but my dears, I sincerely did. 

Despite that, I ushered in the new year with a popular Idaboski slang that goes:

"This is my year of never suffering". 

I am super optimistic that my year is gonna be a beautiful one. Yours too, I know.

Nevertheless, I did learn a lot of lessons last year, and this post will be allllll about them. I know this will definitely encourage, teach, inspire, motivate someone out there so, enjoy!

Since I haven't debuted my imaginary book yet, this space is gonna be like an online diary session. For today, I will be summarising these lessons into five(5) wholesome points so, let's get cracking.

My first lesson is 🥁 "write your own story": 

I may sound unrealistic when I say---I see life as a blank book given to each and everyone of us and we are told to fill our book with words. I, personally, believe that we have the ability to fill our book whichever way we want it because we have the autonomy of choice.

I see a lot of people living dreams that are not theirs; trying to fit into narratives that they can't relate to, just because they see that said narrative working for someone else. Instead of trying to discuss their own story or rather write their own plot, they steal pages off another’s.

In times like these, you have to spend time with yourself, access what you like and use that to write your story. Fill your book with things you love and things you relate to so that you can easily create happy moments instead of trying to play by what someone else has painted as happy moments.

Second lesson is "Drop the victim mindset":

Sometimes, in order for us to drop something we have to understand what it really is.

A victim mindset often involves a tendency to blame external factors, resist taking responsibility, and perceive oneself as powerless. One phrase that sums up this image is: “It’s not my fault” or "it be like that.”

But, is it really?

I noticed an increased trend in exhibiting the victim mindset. This happens when people can't take responsibility for their actions and blame everything they've done on either their zodiac signs or temperaments,  using phrases like "oh, that is just who I am".

Recognizing that this attitude builds up patterns and these patterns form habits and these habits go on to turn our life upside down to the point where we don't even understand logical reasoning, is usually the first step in breaking out of this mindset.

There's a way out though, own your attitude and actions today. Doing this, you'll definitely see improvement in your life. This improvements may not manifest immediately but with time you'll see the full potential.

The third lesson I learnt was "celebrate 🥳 every moment":

When we don't learn as we grow, in the course of time, we tend to repeat or exhibit traits from our childhood we may perceive as healthy but when viewed from another perspective we end up seeing the dangers lurking in the shadows.

I remember how as kids, when given holiday presents, we would cherish those things and hold them so dear to our hearts. I would always think that those presents were only meant for special occasions.

Growing up with such an attitude transcended into only celebrating special moments. This manifested as me developing a longing for results rather than the process. I referred to that as a special moment. Whenever I’m working, I motivate myself with the prospect of reward when I'm done, gruelling through the labour with a sheen of sweat over my pretty brown skin. I thought the process didn't matter and that once I got a hold of the results, voila celebration 🎉

And when the results of my work is something I don't get to see in years, it becomes a daunting task to stay encouraged.  I end up feeling like I'm not putting in enough effort to get my desired results. This, in turn, graces me with imposter syndrome, making me question everything and, subsequently, not putting in my best.

I learnt my lesson though, I started appreciating every tiny step of my journey. I will pay myself through the tiniest win. I started anticipating the journey and eventually enjoyed the process. If you have same mindset of only appreciating the results, this is your sign to start celebrating every moment and appreciating the process. Trust me, you'll see drastic changes in the way things manifest in your life.

My fourth lesson is "appreciate 🥰 the people in your life".

By people, I mean your close loved ones, those people that cannot be compromised with anything in the world. Take out time to celebrate them, give them their roses, tell them you love them while you can.

Life can sometimes take an unpredictable twist and, many of those times, you may not anticipate those twists even if you’ve been given every opportunity to. So, take out time to appreciate and celebrate your silent cheerleaders.

My final lesson is "never stop learning".

In case no one has told you, learning is a lifelong journey. It underscores the continuous and ongoing nature of acquiring knowledge and skills throughout your life. 

There're more parts of your body to turn on than that little buddy down there. Even if your brain doesn't have a nerve ending, it is an organ that needs exercise. So,  stimulate your brain, think out of the box, ask questions and always try to understand how things work. 

I can say proudly that the person I am today is not the person I was last year and definitely not the person I will be next year. This is because I put in intentional and conscious effort to learn.

Learning does not have to be a particular way especially the way we've been thought to which include reading a book. You can learn in different ways depending on how best you absorb information, this is because the process of learning is unique to each individual.

Some people learn through reading others or through songs, movies, life experiences, friends, mentors, you name it. Just don't stop learning. 

It maybe easier for me to state this probably because I'm a literal curious cat and I'm always asking the question "why". Notwithstanding, you can always adopt that lifestyle for yourself. It's easy, and refreshing.

Remember, the most profound life lesson often comes when you have gone through experiences and learnt the lessons that came with them.

Now that you've gone over these lessons, I'd like to know: do they resonate with you? Did you learn any of them as well or are there more lessons you learned that you would like to share with us in the comments section. Do well to pour your knowledge out for us, we always anticipate your response.

Fun fact:

✯ You are about 1cm taller in the morning when you first get up than when you go to bed.

This is because during the day the soft cartilage between your bones gets squashed and compressed.